The most used phrase in my administration if I were to be President would be 'What the hell you mean we're out of missiles?'

By the way, I'm not just one man with a chalkboard. I'm one man with four chalkboards.

When did it become a problem to be a small businessman and become successful? The small businessman - like my father, or like me?

Thanks is part to our education system, we tend to think that we're smarter than the stupid guys in funny wigs who came before us. But that's because we are mistaking technology, progress, and access to information for intelligence. We think that because we know how to use iPhones (but not build them), browse the Internet (but not understand how it works), and use Google (but not really know anything), our educational system is working just great. By the same token, we think that those dumb aristocrats who used horses to get around and didn't have electricity were neanderthals.

People aren't happy unless they buy stuff, and that's because we have become this industrialized nation.

Hello, my name is the republican party, and I have a problem. I am addicted to spending and the government - and a big government. I would like one of them just to stand up and say that.

This president (Barack Obama) I think has exposed himself over and over and over again as a guy who has a deep-seated hatred for white people or the white culture . . . I’m not saying he doesn't like white people, I’m saying he has a problem. This guy is, I believe, a racist.