If I'm ever in a weird car accident, or I commit suicide or something, after the media stops celebrating my death, could they check into it? Because I'm not suicidal. And I'm a pretty good driver.

When we support or vote for candidates outside the two major political parties we are immediately lectured about wasting our vote or making it easier for the less desirable of the two major candidates to claim victory. These lies are repeated every election and they must be ignored. You never waste your vote if you vote your conscience.

When you live in an alcoholic family or an abusive family, you tiptoe, you don't want to step on any mines.

Capitalists, if you think that you can play footsies with these people, you're wrong. They will come for you and drag you into the streets and kill you.

As much as I disagree with Bernie Sanders - at least Bernie Sanders was a man seemingly of principle, a man who actually believed in something, was not surrounding himself with corruption and was moving in the direction that the people are moving.

If you don't find a leader, perhaps it is because you were meant to lead.

Fall to your knees and thank God for Fox News. Pray for Roger Ailes and Rupert Murdoch. Pray for them. Pray for strength and spine, and pray that everybody involved has chicken salad for lunch so it doesn't clog anybody's arteries. Keep them going.