If defamation of religion was illegal it would be a crime for me to say that the notion of transubstantiation is so ridiculous that even a small child should be able to see the insanity and utter physical impossibility of a piece of bread and some wine somehow taking on corporeal form.

If defamation of religion was illegal it would be a crime for me to say that the notion of transubstantiation is so ridiculous that even a small child should be able to see the insanity and utter physical impossibility of a piece of bread and some wine somehow taking on corporeal form.

It is fashionable to scoff at Americans, but they routinely produce most of the important and ground-breaking entertainment in the world. 'Popular culture' is still culture, Shakespeare was once as popular as any of today's icons with the common people.

According to the nanny who sold her story, Victoria used to scream at her husband: I gave up my music for you. So, the next time you feel like slagging off David Beckham, just take a moment to ponder on how much we all owe the man.

Are we expected to live in a world where we can no longer send death threats to colleagues via email? Where we can no longer IM other people to suggest physically improbable and morally dodgy sexual practices? Where doctoring photos of people to place them in legally compromising positions is frowned upon? Who wants to live in that sort of world? Not this column, that's for sure.

There are two types of people in this world - those who would appear on reality television and the rest of us.

What does Christmas mean if we can't encourage small children to sit on a stranger's lap?