When stupidity is considered patriotism, it is unsafe to be intelligent.

I expect death to be nothingness and, for removing me from all possible fears of death, I am thankful to atheism.

Having reached 451 books as of now doesn't help the situation. If I were to be dying now, I would be murmuring, "Too bad! Only four hundred fifty-one." (Those would be my next-to-last words. The last ones will be: "I love you, Janet.") [They were. -Janet.]

Self-education is, I firmly believe, the only kind of education there is.

The true delight is in the finding out rather than in the knowing.

I don't subscribe to the thesis, 'Let the buyer beware,' I prefer the disregarded one that goes, 'Let the seller be honest.'

Jokes of the proper kind, properly told, can do more to enlighten questions of politics, philosophy, and literature than any number of dull arguments.