My first celebrity crush was Jonathan Brandis. I even got to talk to him on the phone. I wrote a fan letter, and he answered. Talk about a surreal experience.

Remind me," he paused, drawing in a stuttered gasp, "to never piss you off again. Christ, are you secretly a ninja?

It was a cookie, not a crack pipe.

Sorry,” he said, his voice thick and gruff. “It’s morning and you’re sitting on me. That’s a combination meant to bring any man down.

Bridget did the only thing she could do in this situation that wouldn't end with her doing a life stint in prison. She flipped the woman off. With both hands.

Time was a funny and fickle thing. Sometimes there was never enough of it, and other times it stretched out endlessly.

Actually, I'm going to nerd out on you, so prepare.