When you've found another soul who see's in to your own...take good care of each other..and remember to be kind.

I let her do some of my laundry and she slipped in a few meals in between, and next thing I remember, she was all moved in.

Lighten up while you still can, don't even try to understand. Just find a place to make your stand, and take it easy.

My forays into trying to date girls my own age from the school I went to were all pretty tortured.

Eleven on a scale of ten, honey, let me introduce you to my redneck friend.

Musician jokes are a kind of joke that usually have to do with how much money someone makes. Musicians are always starving, so they're really mean to each other about who makes what.

And while the future's there for anyone to change, still you know it's seems, It would be easier sometimes to change the past.