I'm not going to be joining ZZ Top. You know they can't play my stuff. It's too complicated.

I'd rather be Jack be smart, than Jack be quick. Watch out for the man with the big fat licking stick.

Hair is the first thing. And teeth the second. Hair and teeth. A man got those two things he's got it all.

My expectations of other people, I double them on myself.

I had to tell about my colonic, which expresses the fact why I'm so neat today as opposed to a few years ago. I never knew that the weight made that much difference.

It doesn't matter how you travel it, it's the same road. It doesn't get any easier when you get bigger, it gets harder. And it will kill you if you let it.

I did the thing with bonds, which was about 30 million dollars, and didn't get none of the money on them.