It's been great getting better with you.

In Lilly's eyes her beautiful clear water eyes there is what I have sought and never found, wanted and never had, hoped for and never discovered. Love.

I will not allow people to impose rules on me that don't make sense to me. And I live and work very much outside the literary world and the literary system. What they think and what they believe and what their rules are mean nothing to me.

Sleep is still difficult I sleep for three or four hours a day. Usually sometime in the afternoon. I walk in the cold, keep myself numb. I cry less, and less." (James Frey, pg.88)

Lying became part of my life. I lied if I needed to lie to get something or get out of something

Stay. Fight. Live. Take it. Cry. Cry. Cry.

I feel strong. Not strong enough to face myself, but strong enough to keep going.