"Uh-huh," I said. "Because all you mad, evil scientists sit around whipping up batches of Pillsbury's finest during your coffee breaks. I mean, this is pathetic."

And there I was, pretty as heck, brown eyes, a few freckles, fashion challenged, and a bad attitude. Max II.

What's so funny 'bout peace, love, and world destruction?

Iggy: "I'll grab a zebra; Gaz, you fill all the bubbles with your trademark scent. so people are choking and gagging; and let's throw beef jerky in their eyes! Now, that's a plan!

The best way to get kids reading more is to give them books that they'll gobble up - and that will make them ask for another.

Basically, I have two speeds.... Hostile or smart-aleck. Your choice.

You know things have gone bad when military marches pass for pop music.