It was during a cosmetic procedure that I first had painkillers.

I don't have great thighs. I have very big breasts and a soft, fatty little tummy. And I've got back fat. People assume that I'm walking around in little spaghetti-strap dresses. It's insidious - Glam Jamie, the Perfect Jamie, the great figure, blah, blah, blah. And I don't want the unsuspecting 40-year-old women of the world to think that I've got it going on. It's such a fraud. And I'm the one perpetuating it.

It was during a cosmetic procedure that I first had painkillers.

I believe that life is hard. That we all are going to walk through things that are hard and challenging, and yet advertising wants us to believe that it's all easy.

For years I stopped reading beauty magazines because I couldn't look at one without wanting to blow my brains out. How can those women look so good?

I too was a little embarrassed by my recent topless 'scandal' and the subsequent parodies.

I'm not a prophet. I'm not a teacher. I have no degrees. My degree is from the University of Life.