I finally realized that until you understand why you do things, you have no control over what you do.
When you talk about an injury and the kind of depression you go through, it's not just because you're out of shape and you can't go out and play. You're missing a part of you. That's what's painful. That's what hurts.
I love the game. It's fun to play, period. I love running around and getting sweaty. I love trying to lead my team. I love facing the challenge of another team that's better.