A lot of people who start work at a very young age never grow up because they never got that opportunity to be a child, so they hold on to that and still do a lot of childish, silly things.

MTV was completely unaware of it. It was not my intention that it go as far as it did. I apologize to anyone offended - including the audience, MTV, CBS and the NFL.

Self-expression is my goal, I want to be real with my feelings. Singing and dancing and all the joy that goes with performing come from my heart. If I can't feel it, I won't do it.

Another side to me is this very sexual being. When I look back on my life, it's always been there. It's been there since I was 10 years old, having the imagination that I had.

It's very hard trying to have love and a career at the same time. For those who can, great, but I can't.

I can express gratitude for the simple act of being able to breathe in and breathe out. I can move away from darkness and depression to light and hope. I can be happy with who I am, not what I should be, or what I might have been, or what someone tells me I must be. I am me, the true me; you are you, the true you - and that's good. That's beautiful. That's enough.

To be given permission to be confused -- and remain confused -- for as long as it takes would have been a huge gift.