You don't need to watch out for me, Clay." But I did, Hannah. And I wanted to. I could have helped you. But when I tried, you pushed me away. I can almost hear Hannah's voice speaking my nest thought for me. "Then why didn't you try harder?

If I had a chance with him, I missed it. No, I didn't miss it. I threw it away.

When you try rescuing someone and discover they can't be reached, why would you ever throw that back in their face?

Because our lies matched. It was a sign.

Because it may seem like a small role now, but it matters. In the end, everything matters.

And concentrating on the spot where the two spindles should be is the closest I get to looking Hannah's eyes as she tells my story.

Don't give up on me now. I'm sorry. I guess that's an odd thing to say. Because isn't that what I'm doing? Giving up?