If you want to make god laugh, make a plan.

I'm a massive movie nerd. That being said, I could retire tomorrow because I wrote this movie 'Goon' and it came out, and it connected and it's a wonderful flick that I think is beautiful and then it had this wonderful life and it means a lot to a lot of people.

I have a little sister, and I'm constantly annoyed [by] how terribly written most females are in most everything - and especially in comedy. Their anatomy seems to be the only defining aspect of their character, and I just find that untrustful and it straight-up offends me.

In the best-case scenario, the audience sees themselves in your shoes. The only way you can do that is if you try to play it as if it was happening to you.

I count absolutely no chickens before they're hatched. In fact, I assume they're all dead in their shells, inside their eggs.

I'm a chronic ad-libber. So whoever hires me, often to their chagrin, should know that I will be talking a bunch of smack.

You always want to try and evolve an art form. It's not a very humble ambition; it reeks of arrogance. If you can, you want to try to do something that people haven't done before and give people something that they haven't seen.