Saturday morning was their unrestricted television time, and they usually took advantage of it to watch a series of cartoon shows that would certainly have been impossible before the discovery of LSD.

This was just no fun. I wanted my brain back.

Getting yelled at by a furious woman should be treated as a semiformal occasion.

I sighed; as comforting as it may be to some of us, sarcasm, like youth, is wasted on the young.

It happens; incompetence is rewarded more often than not.

First things first has always been my motto, mostly because it makes absolutely no sense - after all, if first things were second or third, they wouldn't be first things, would they? Still, cliches exist to comfort the feeble minded, not to provide any actual meaning.

Money to me had always been merely something the sheep used to show each other how wonderful they were.