The U.S. continues the search for Osama bin Laden. Reports suggest that bin Laden is most likely hiding out somewhere remote and barren, where he will not encounter others. The FBI has begun searching theaters showing the movie 'Glitter.'

Donald Trump got in some trouble for saying that John McCain is not a war hero, and said, 'I like people that weren't captured.' Not good. In fact, Trump's people are telling him to lay low for a while until this all combs over.

I like video games, I like tech, I like being positive.

Today Carly Fiorina announced that she is running for president. Someone else bought 'CarlyFiorina.org' and posted 30,000 sad emoticons to represent all the people she laid off at Hewlett-Packard. I haven't seen that many sad, blank faces in one place since the Mayweather-Pacquiao fight.

Vladimir Putin celebrated his 63rd birthday today. He had a nice party, but it got awkward when two of his friends got him the same country.

During a charity boxing match on Friday, Mitt Romney lasted two rounds against Evander Holyfield and raised a million dollars. It was just like Holyfield's fight with Mike Tyson, except Romney chewed off his other ear talking about his 18 grandchildren.

Thank you... motion sensor hand towel machine. You never work, so I just end up looking like I'm waving hello to a wall robot.