I know a lot of funny people in a lot of funny places.

I think the Internet is the most dangerous thing invented since the atomic bomb.

Unemployment is sky-rocketing; deflation is in our future for the first time since the Great Depression. I don't care whose fault it is, it's the truth.

Grandma's on the front porch with a Bible in her hand, sometimes I hear her singing take me to the promised land.

Some people say I'm obnoxious and lazy, that I'm uneducated, that my opinion means nothing, but I know I'm a real good dancer.

Be careful of those who kill in Jesus' name; he don't believe in killing at all.

Turning music into digital was just a con, a record-company con.