He is so stupid you can't trust him with an idea.

When you know a friend is there you do not go to see him. Then he's gone and you blast your conscience to shreds that you did not see him.

[He] fell right into the oldest conviction in the world-- that the girl you are in love with can't possibly be anything but true and honest.

Socialism never took root in America.

In writing, habit seems to be a much stronger force than either willpower or inspiration.

Guy don't need no sense to be a nice fella. Seems to me sometimes it jus' works the other way around. Take a real smart guy and he ain't hardly ever a nice fella.

He was born in Bercy on the outskirts of Paris and trained in France, and while he knows a little Poodle-English, he responds quickly only to commands in French. Otherwise he has to translate, and that slows him down.