You can't receive forgiveness unless you let God deal with your deceit.
There's a special place in hell for what some people have done but there's also a special place in God's heart for their forgiveness.
When you get honest with God, you can exchange the fig leaves you used to cover your sin with the righteousness of Jesus Christ.
Some people are into position, not the mission.
If God did not care for you, there would never be a sense of a need to respond.
You can't forgive your sin. Only God can.