I'm not going to try and change you mind." "If you're here, you accept it's my choice. This is the first thing I've been in control of since the accident." "I know." And there it was. He knew it, and I knew it. There was nothing left for me to do. Do you know how hard it is to say nothing ? When every atom of you strains to do the opposite? I just tried to be, tried to absorb the man I loved through osmosis, tried to imprint what I had left of him on myself. I did not speak.

Try to write at least 500 words a day. You may ditch 499 of them tomorrow, but you will still be moving forward.

Just live well. Just live

And it was suddenly very simple: There was no choice.

How is it possible to exist with so much pain?

Nobody fights you like your own sister; nobody else knows the most vulnerable parts of you and will aim for them without mercy.

I am conscious that knowing me has caused you pain, and grief, and I hope that one day when you are less angry with me and less upset you will see not just that I could only have done the thing that I did, but also that this will help you live a really good life, a better life, than if you hadn’t met me.