There are but three ways for a man to revenge himself of the censure of the world,--to despise it, to return the like, or to endeavor to live so as to avoid it; the first of these is usually pretended, the last is almost impossible, the universal practice is for the second.
Jonathan Swift"Lawyers Are": Those whose interests and abilities lie in perverting, confounding and eluding the law.
Jonathan SwiftA true critic, in the perusal of a book, is like a dog at a feast, whose thoughts and stomach are wholly set upon what the guests fling away, and consequently is apt to snarl most when there are the fewest bones.
Jonathan SwiftUsually speaking, the worst-bred person in company is a young traveller just returned from abroad.
Jonathan Swift