He was a self-made man who owed his lack of success to nobody.

The laws of nature are only as immutable as the minds which promote them. Ignorance of the law is 9/10ths of the law. Just because you aren't paranoid doesn't mean they aren't out to get you.

Peace on earth would mean the end of civilization as we know it.

Death to all modifiers, he declared one day, and out of every letter that passed through his hands went every adverb and every adjective.

Success and failure are both difficult to endure. Along with success come drugs, divorce, fornication, bullying, travel, meditation, medication, depression, neurosis and suicide. With failure comes failure.

There was only one catch and that was Catch-22. Orr would be crazy to fly more missions and sane if he didn't, but if he was sane he had to fly them. If he flew them he was crazy and didn't have to; but if he didn't want to he was sane and had to.

Erogenous zones are either everywhere or nowhere.