When Roseanne read the first script of mine that got into her hands without being edited by someone else she said, 'How can you write a middle-aged woman this well?' I said, 'If you met my mom you wouldn't ask'.

The world is scary, and things are overwhelming, and there's a lot at stake.

Stay crunchy, even in milk.

Because to me, there is no logic of any kind behind misogyny. Therefore, it’s funny, because it’s so completely random to me. It’s senseless.

The fact of the matter is fame predates even the age of cinema. There's always been fame, there's always been the caveman who's prettier or killed a bigger lion, or somebody started a story about a guy.

I think it's always important for academics to study popular culture, even if the thing they are studying is idiotic. If it's successful or made a dent in culture, then it is worthy of study to find out why.

"'Come on, guys, I'm the leader of a whole movie...!' I tell when I want people to fear and respect me. Not wildly effective."