One reason that the task of inventing manners is so difficult is that etiquette is folk custom, and people have emotional ties to the forms of their youth. That is why there is such hostility between generations in times of rapid change; their manners being different, each feels affronted by the other, taking even the most surface choices for challenges.

Smart people duck when they hear the dread announcement 'I'm going to be perfectly honest with you.

You do not have to do everything disagreeable that you have a right to do

'Honesty' in social life is often used as a cover for rudeness. But there is quite a difference between being candid in what you're talking about, and people voicing their insulting opinions under the name of honesty.

Honesty has come to mean the privilege of insulting you to your face without expecting redress.

When politeness is used to show up other people, it is reclassified as rudeness. Thus it is technically impossible to be too polite.

We have the reverse of the Puritan work ethic in America now. No one ever becomes a star by plugging along year after year. What is needed is flair, talent, 'an eye,' contacts, charisma, and, most of all, naturalness.