Love is when you realize that he's as sexy as Woody Allen, as smart as Jimmy Connors, as funny as Ralph Nader, as athletic as Henry Kissinger and nothing like Robert Redford - but you'll take him anyway.

But it's hard to be hip over thirty when everyone else is nineteen, when the last dance we learned was the Lindy, and the last we heard, girls who looked like Barbara Streisand were trying to do something about it.

as we acquire new aches and new pains, our health care is, of necessity, being supplied by internists, cardiologists, dermatologists, podiatrists, urologists, periodontists, gynecologists and psychiatrists, from all of whom we want a second opinion. We want a second opinion that says, don't worry, you are going to live forever.

Mid-grade readers don't have short attention spans, they just have low boredom tolerance.

I could tell it was going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

For some it takes a lifetime to find true love, But for the lucky ones a lifetime is merely enough to share the love they've found.

Absence makes the heart grow frozen, not fonder.