You put together two people who have not been put together before; and sometimes the world is changed, sometimes not. They may crash and burn, or burn and crash. But sometimes, something new is made, and then the world is changed. Together, in that first exaltation, that first roaring sense of uplift, they are greater than their two separate selves. Together, they see further, and they see more clearly.
Julian BarnesLoving humanity means as much, and as little, as loving raindrops, or loving the Milky Way. You say that you love humanity? Are you sure you arenโt treating yourself to easy self-congratulation, seeking approval, making certain youโre on the right side?
Julian BarnesYou would think, wouldnโt you, that if you were the child of a happy marriage, then you ought to have a better than average marriage yourself โ either through some genetic inheritance or because youโd learnt from example? But it doesnโt seem to work like that. So perhaps you need the opposite example โ to see mistakes in order not to make them yourself. Except this would mean that the best way for parents to ensure their children have happy marriages would be to have unhappy ones themselves. So whatโs the answer?
Julian BarnesThe writer must be universal in sympathy and an outcast by nature: only then can he see clearly.
Julian BarnesI certainly believe we all suffer damage, one way or another. How could we not,except in a world of perfect parents, siblings, neighbours, companions? And then there is the question on which so much depends, of how we react to the damage: whether we admit it or repress it,and how this affects our dealings with others.Some admit the damage, and try to mitigate it;some spend their lives trying to help others who are damaged; and there are those whose main concern is to avoid further damage to themselves, at whatever cost. And those are the ones who are ruthless, and the ones to be careful of.
Julian Barnes