I think about my choice. Either outcome is bleak. If I stay and live through high school, go to college, get a job, what will ever change? This blackness inside will never go away. I don't make friends; I'll always be alone. If I go, at least there's hope of peace. Chance of a new and better life on the other side.

Miracles don't happen. You make them happen. They're not wishes or dreams or candles on a cake. They're not impossible. Reality is real. It's totally and completely under my control.

What will I become? Because I won't be me any longer. That will be a relief. I dont want to be the helpless person I've always been.

Who will see you through the darkness? "Me," I key in the answer. "I'll find my own way.

Everyone's a liar. Everyone I've ever known.

I'm all she's got and if I don't make it this time . . ." You'll pass through the light. A ribbon of guilt twists my stomach. I'm all Kim and Chip have too. But the difference is, they'll be better off without me.

I hear you. I just don't believe a word you say.