When I started at the Guardian, though, I couldnt think of anything we saw eye to eye on, except feminism, and even this would soon be arguable as Guardian writers queued up to drool over Eminem.

A wedding is a funeral which masquerades as a feast. And the greater the pageantry, the deeper the savagery.

It has been said that a pretty face is a passport. But it's not, it's a visa, and it runs out fast.

I have experienced jealousy, possessiveness, verbal abuse and violence from men, but I have also experienced jealousy, possessiveness, verbal abuse and violence from women, usually when I failed to respond to their advances.

The money I pay for my cultural experiences came willingly from my own pocket - they were not the result of bread being removed from the mouths of the poor so that Miss Thing here could mince off to the circus smelling of roses.

Whenever I am sent a new book on the lively arts, the first thing I do is look for myself in the index.

I have always voted Labour and I always will. I have got to have one stupid, bovine part of me and that's the part that votes Labour.