I could never be in a situation with a job where I was not allowed to listen to music all day. I would rather work at a fast food restaurant where I could turn on the radio all day rather than be in a situation where I have to sneak and listen to music.

If I was more complacent and I let things slide, my life would be easier, but you all wouldn't be as entertained. My misery is your pleasure.

Life is a b*tch depending how you dress her.

You want me to be great, but you don't ever want me to say I'm great?

Clothing should be like food. There should never be a $5000 sweater. You know what should cost $5000? A car.

I love [Kim Kardashian] nude selfies. Like, I love the ones from the side, the back ones, and the front. I just love seeing her naked.

Couldn't afford a car so he named his daughter Alexis