I contemplate the notion that maybe regrets are a process of accumulation of time, as unavoidable as a closet full of clothes and more bags of them in the attic. Is accumulated baggage what makes people get old? If so, they need to clean out their fecking attics, send the stuff to consignment shops and remember how to walk around naked like kids, little bellies sticking out, always ready for a good laugh.
Karen Marie MoningThose who were so long imprisoned in ice and darkness seem to find the sunlight jarring, painful. The longer I walk around with this grief inside me, the more I understand that. Itโs as if sunshine is a slap in the face that says, Look, the worldโs all bright and shiny! Too bad youโre not.
Karen Marie MoningYouโre early.โ I give him a mutinous look. Of course he thinks my being early is about him. Itโs not. Mac was at Chesterโs last night at eight. I think sheโs hunting me. Since I canโt be late to avoid her, I have to be early. โWatch broke. Thought I was on time.โ โYou donโt wear a watch.โ โSee? I knew I had a problem. Iโll just dash out and get one. Be back tomorrow. On time.
Karen Marie MoningWhen I thought I'd killed him, I felt more alone than I've felt in a long time. Like I couldn't stand walking through this city knowing he wasn't in it. Like somehow, as long as he was out there somewhere, if I was ever really in trouble, I knew where I could go and while maybe he wouldn't do exactly what I wanted him to do, he'd keep me alive. He'd get me through whatever it was to live another day.
Karen Marie Moning