I think you have to be completely merciless with yourself.
If music is sound & came from silence, then silence is potentially greater than sound.
I'm my own most merciless critic onstage.
I cannot say what I think is right about Music. I only know the rightness of it.
If a person plays dissonance long enough, it will sound like consonance. It's a language that was alien and then it's less and less alien as it continues to live.
If I'm not a jazz player all the time, I've at least been cued in to what I do by jazz.