I performed in a bowling alley before while people were still bowling. Cut the check, and I will perform anywhere.

In comedy, my strengths are improvisation.

I don't want enemies. I want friends, and I want them in all shapes, sizes, and colors, and loving whoever they want to.

I love soft-cotton white T-shirts.

My brother tried to explain sex to me when I was 7 - and he did it with a cup.

Success isn't supposed to happen, no matter how hard you work. There's no guarantee you're going to succeed. There's nothing set in stone.

I was the guy on the swim team entertaining the bus on the way to the meets.