I am completely and utterly hooked to all the great shows on A&E and Court TV that are about small town murder.

I've loved the Internet space in terms of creative content control and ownership, the things I haven't had since I started as a stand-up comedian.

I think it's important that your first film be your worst film, that one's life trajectory should go up.

If I have anything to offer as an actor, it's only my ability to make the person real.

I am completely and utterly hooked to all the great shows on A&E and Court TV that are about small town murder. These shows like Forensic Files, City Confidential, I just can't get enough of them. It's always the same sort of deal. You know that they interview the actual people that lived through the experience. I miss Paul Winfield as the host of City Confidential, may he rest in peace.

The law against sodomy is trying to stop homosexual men from enjoying themselves. That's what the law is all about. But this is stupid. What do you do according to the law? You find two men enjoying themselves sexually. You arrest them and throw them in... prison? That outta do it.

No one smokes because they like the way it tastes. If we did, they'd make cigarette-flavored cookies, candy, ice cream. What is this? Marlboro fudge with nuts? Give me a scoop of that, willya? She's gonna have the Menthol Swirl with the Camel chip.