I had taught myself that a human being might as well look for diamond tiaras in the gutter as for rewards and punishments that were fair.

My soul seemed as foul as smoke from burning cat fur.

What has been America's most nurturing contribution to the culture of this planet so far? Many would say jazz. I, who love jazz, will say this instead: Alcoholics Anonymous.

It pains me even now, even a million years later, to write about such human misbehaviour. A million years later, I feel like apologizing for the human race. That’s all I can say.

I hate it that Americans are taught to fear some books and some ideas as though they were diseases.

The Contessa was surely way ahead of her time, too, in believing that men were not only usless and idiotic, but downright dangerous. That idea wouldn't catch on big in her native country until the last three years of the Vietnam War.

Everything that ever has been always will be, and everything that ever will be always has been.