You have to go forward: It's the only way. You have to go forward no matter what happens. This is the universal law.

I think of the quietness of Julian's voice as he said I love you, the steadiness of his rib cage rising and falling against my back, as we sleep.I love you, Julian. But the words don't come.

Each step is more difficult than the last; the heaviness fills me and turns my limbs to stone. You must hurt or be hurt.

I’ve always hated being looked at.

willing me to understand: that people should be sacrificed to causes, that beauty can be built on the backs of the dead.

Maybe, the hope said. Maybe.

Amor deliria nervosa. The deadliest of all deadly things.