The all American work ethic, destructive enough by itself, also packs a gender double standard that strip-mines the natural resources of both parents. It has taught us that as their earnings and success increase, men become "more manly," while women become "less feminine." This perverse cultural dynamic gives fathers an incentive to stay away from their families and kill themselves at work, while coercing mothers to limit their career commitment, which in turn limits their wages and shortchanges their families.

Other than life experience, nothing left a deeper imprint on my formative self than the movies.

If the family were a boat, it would be a canoe that makes no progress unless everyone paddles.

It's smart to be friends with one's sex partner but dumb to have sex with one's friends.

If the family were a fruit, it would be an orange, a circle of sections, held together but separable - each segment distinct.

Work-family conflicts - the trade-offs of your money or your life, your job or your child - would not be forced upon women with such sanguine disregard if men experienced the same career stalls caused by the-buck-stops-here responsibility for children.

If knowledge is power, clandestine knowledge is power squared; it can be withheld, exchanged, and leveraged.