The risk for a woman who considers her helpless children her "job" is that the children's growth toward self-sufficiency may be experienced as a refutation of the mother's indispensability, and she may unconsciously sabotage their growth as a result.
Letty Cottin PogrebinWork-family conflicts - the trade-offs of your money or your life, your job or your child - would not be forced upon women with such sanguine disregard if men experienced the same career stalls caused by the-buck-stops-here responsibility for children.
Letty Cottin PogrebinIf family violence teaches children that might makes right at home, how will we hope to cure the futile impulse to solve worldly conflicts with force?
Letty Cottin PogrebinWhen men are oppressed, it's a tragedy. When women are oppressed, it's tradition.
Letty Cottin PogrebinWhy hope to live a long life if we're only going to fill it with self-absorption, body maintenance and image repair? When we die, do we want people to exclaim 'She looked ten years younger,' or do we want them to say 'She lived a great life'?
Letty Cottin PogrebinCompared to other parents, remarried parents seem more desirous of their child's approval, more alert to the child's emotional state, and more sensitive in their parent-child relations. Perhaps this is the result of heightened empathy for the child's suffering, perhaps it is a guilt reaction; in either case, it gives the child a potent weapon--the power to disrupt the new household and come between parent and the new spouse.
Letty Cottin Pogrebin