It keeps her purity vacum-sealed to preserve its freshness for her future husband.

Just because you're funny doesn't mean you get to be cruel.

You don't know me, dude," he says, not smiling this time. Gonzo examines his cards, prepping for his next move. "People always think that they know other people, but they don't. Not really. I mean, maybe they know things about them, like they won't eat doughnuts or they like action movies or whatever. But they don't know what their friends do in their rooms alone at night or what happened to them when they were kids or if they feel ****ed up for no reason at all.

Naughty John, Naughty John, does his work with his apron on. Cuts your throat and takes your bones, sells 'em off for a coupla stones.

I'm going to eviscerate you and leave your organs on a pike in the yard as a warning to those who wear large jewelry.

If this were a movie, I would bust a secret move so fierce the entire place would be razed to the ground. I'd finish with something snappy like "And don't forget my soda, punk" while I strolled off into the night.

She hadn’t meant to get trapped in a conversation. That was the trouble with offering help to old people.