Society can exist only on the basis that there is some amount of polished lying and that no one says exactly what he thinks.

It is that unoccupied space which makes a room habitable, as it is our leisure hours which make life endurable.

I am put on my best behavior, which means the same thing as the most uncomfortable behavior.

Today we are afraid of simple words like goodness and mercy and kindness. We don't believe in the good old words because we don't believe in good old values anymore. And that's why the world is sick.

I have a hankering to go back to the Orient and discard my necktie. Neckties strangle clear thinking.

If one's bowels move, one is happy, and if they don't move, one is unhappy. That is all there is to it.

A solemn funeral is inconceivable to the Chinese mind.