My new apartment might be a place where there are lots of children. They might gather on my porch to play, and when I step out for groceries, they will ask me, "Hi, do you have any kids?" and then, "Why not, don't you like kids?" "I like kids," I will explain. "I like kids very much." And when I almost run over them with my car, in my driveway, I will feel many different things.

You know, I'm just a very boring, not very funny person in person. I don't feel pressured to be otherwise.

A short story is a love affair, a novel is a marriage. A short story is a photograph; a novel is a film.

I don't have a love life. I have a like life.

She smiled at him, with longing. 'Where do you live,' she asked, 'and how do I get there?

Her life her life had taken on the shape of a terrible mistake. She hadn't been given the proper tools to make a real life with, she decided, that was it. She'd been given a can of gravy and a hair-brush and told, "There you go." She'd stood there for years, blinking and befuddled, brushing the can with the brush.

I don't think of any sentence as a "one-liner", but I do pay attention to how people actually speak when they are being funny. Rhythm is key.