If I'm smart then I'll run away, but I'm not so I guess I'll stay

I was a buffoon and an idiot until the age of forty

We're very privileged as Americans - it's easy to forget about the rest of the world and to think that your problems are the most important problems. Even poor people in America live better than poor people most everywhere else.

I know I'm not the greatest singer or dancer, but that doesn't interest me, I'm interested in being provocative and pushing people's buttons.

If I was a girl again, I would like to be like my fans, I would like to be like Madonna.

I've always wanted to be taller. I feel like a shrimp, but that's the way it goes. I'm five-foot four-and-a-half-inches - that's actually average. Everything about me is average. Everything's normal, in the books. It's the things inside me that make me not average.

I'd love to be a memorable figure in the history of entertainment in some sexual, comic, tragic way. I'd like to leave the impression that Marilyn Monroe did, to be able to arouse so many different feelings in people.