Bad humor is an evasion of reality; good humor is an acceptance of it.

People do not believe lies because they have to, but because they want to.

One of the many pleasures of old age is giving things up.

When Dwight Eisenhower became president, I personally was delighted. I thought that that was a very good thing.

I think Queen Elisabeth II is a charming woman.

On television I feel like a man playing piano in a brothel; every now and again he solaces himself by playing 'Abide with Me' in the hope of edifying both the clients and the inmates

It has to be admitted that we English have sex on the brain, which is a very unsatisfactory place to have it.