I think people have always misinterpreted my self-destructive nature as nihilistic, because if you don't care about the world, you can't create art. I am misanthropic and self-loathing, but never nihilistic. And I think I act far worse off-stage than onstage.

Watching movies is my one distraction.

It's not like I turn off Marilyn Manson and I'm an everyday guy who goes and has another job and doesn't think about any of this stuff. Marilyn Manson is the most real thing that can come from me.

I fear being like everyone I hate, I fear failure, I fear losing control. I love balancing between chaos and control with everything I do. I always have a fear of going one way or another, getting lost in something, or losing everything to get lost in. And I fear being a completely acceptable sheep in society.

For me, it's never been an ego situation where I have been "I'm the boss; expletive you." It's always been a situation where someone comes to me and says "I can't tolerate working with you anymore" and I would admit sometimes I wouldn't blame them for that. But I also sometimes think I'm not that difficult to figure out. I don't really know what has driven people to be so angry and bitter - people like my old keyboard player Pogo, who I've known for such a long time. I feel bad for him, but there are grievances with everything.

A story might sell if there's a headline like 'Marilyn Manson admits to being Satanic', all the little hypocrites will go and buy the magazine, read about what evil, weird people we are and will feel better about themselves.

I heard this album as finished, I heard it in dreams . . . It was like the revelations of John the Baptist or something.