We need to forgive - but mindfully. We need compassion that powered by wisdom. That's the way to address our bullies.
Mark ColemanMindfulness is the ability to be aware, to note, to notice. When we apply that to our thoughts and mental habits, we bring a clarity of awareness in seeing what's just an ordinary thought and what's a judging thought that's pejorative or putting us down in some way. So, we first bring that lens of awareness, and then we can do all kinds of different strategies. We can inquire.
Mark ColemanI do believe there's a place for anger in spiritual life. Just as a mother protects a child, as parents protect offspring under threat, we need a place for the conscious use of that fire. The positive side of anger as fierceness.
Mark ColemanMindfulness is the primary tool in that we get a little space between ourselves and the thoughts and then we actually can be more responsive, as in: Do I want to listen to that? Do I want to ignore it? Do I want to say "no thank you". Do I want to inquire if that's really true or helpful? So we start with mindfulness and we're not engaging, because as soon as we do that, we've given the critic authority. Instead, we want to notice the critic but not give it any attention, not really give it much value.
Mark ColemanOne of the tools I like a lot is the Just Like Me practice. It's one of the empathy practices where we put ourselves in the other's shoes. Rather than get caught up in the difference in the ideologies, we actually come back to the fundamental idea: just like me, this person on the opposite political spectrum wants to be happy, wants to be safe, wants to thrive, wants to be healthy, wants to find peace of mind.
Mark Coleman