A man is accepted into a church for what he believes and he is turned out for what he knows.

Love is madness, if thwarted it develops fast.

Intellectual food is like any other; it is pleasanter and more beneficial to take it with a spoon than a shovel.

You take the lies out of him, and he'll shrink to the size of your hat; you take the malice out of him, and he'll disappear.

The idea that no gentleman ever swears is all wrong. He can swear and still be a gentleman if he does it in a nice and benevolent and affectionate way.

It has been said that a Scotchman has not seen the world until he has seen Edinburgh; and I think that I may say that an American has not seen the United States until he has seen Mardi Gras in New Orleans.

Only a government that is rich and safe can afford to be a democracy, for democracy is the most expensive and nefarious kind of government ever heard of on earth