A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom when he can no longer be led by the nose.

A historian who would convey the truth has got to lie. Often he must enlarge the truth by diameters, otherwise his reader would not be able to see it.

Indeed, none but the Deity can tell what is good luck and what is bad before the returns are all in.

Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.

While the rest of the species is descended from apes, redheads are descended from cats.

The most successful people are those who do all year long what they would otherwise do on their summer vacation.

The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.