The knowledge of numbers is one of the chief distinctions between us and the brutes.

I believe more follies are committed out of complaisance to the world, than in following our own inclinations.

Civility costs nothing, and buys everything.

The pretty fellows you speak of, I own entertain me sometimes, but is it impossible to be diverted with what one despises? I can laugh at a puppet show, at the same time I know there is nothing in it worth my attention or regard.

I regard almost all quarrels of princes on the same footing, and I see nothing that marks man's unreason so positively as war. Indeed, what folly to kill one another for interests often imaginary, and always for the pleasure of persons who do not think themselves even obliged to those who sacrifice themselves for them!

Muse, time has taught me that all metaphysical systems, even historical facts given as truths, are hardly that, so I amuse myself with more agreeable lies; I no longer read anything but novels.

People wish their enemies dead - but I do not; I say give them the gout, give them the stone!