I would enjoy experiencing the hollowness of success at first- hand.

Courage, determination, and hard work are all very nice, but not so nice as an oil well in the back yard.

Lies and promises are necessary but not sufficient.

One's fetishes are fascinating, but not because of their beauty or significance. The same could be said for one's genitals, or one's children.

An academic dialect is perfected when its terms are hard to understand and refer only to one another.

Warning: fortune cookies don't care what happens to you.

A sense of absurdity interferes with my efforts to appear venerable.