I would have been a disastrous soldier.

I'm a wet liberal really, and always have been. But I'm sort of an aggressive wet liberal.

If you can't get a job as a pianist in a brothel, you become a royal reporter.

I've always found women more loyal, more disciplined, less neurotic, more hardworking. I just think they're perfect colleagues. Whereas, God knows, I've dealt with plenty of neurotic men.

As George Orwell wisely observed a generation later, the only way swiftly to end a war is to lose it.

People who get on at school are the ones who play by the rules, and no one's going to get far in later life playing by the system.

It's miraculous how much easier the computer has made my sort of work.