Writing has always been the primary way I make sense of the world.

Writing has always been the primary way I make sense of the world.

It's a blessing not to be alone in your grief but it's also painful to see your parents and siblings in pain.

And after my mother's death I became more open to and empathetic about other people's struggles and losses.

Relationships take up energy; letting go of them, psychiatrists theorize, entails mental work. When you lose someone you were close to, you have to reassess your picture of the world and your place in it. The more your identity was wrapped up with the deceased, the more difficult the loss.

I believe in the importance of individuality, but in the midst of grief I also find myself wanting connection - wanting to be reminded that the sadness I feel is not just mine but ours.

If the condition of grief is nearly universal, its transactions are exquisitely personal.